10 Things I've Learned From Watching You Grow

How being your cousin changed my life.

When I was 10, my aunt picked me up from a birthday party and we went to a pizza place for lunch. It was there that she told me she was having not one, not two, but three babies! “I’ll need lots of help,” she said, “they’ll need their cousin, B.”

Little did she know that the three boys she’d have the following November would become who I needed more than they could ever need me. The most important relationships I'd build, and the first boys to ever hold my heart.

The best title I’ll ever have is “The Triplet’s Cousin.”

The best name I’ll ever be called is “Bay-wee.”

The best miracle I’ll ever receive is that despite the rough beginning, all three of them are healthy and thriving.

Here are ten things I’ve learned since they were born:

1. How much I could love a tiny human. Times three.

When they were born, a nurse took me back to see them all in their incubators. I remember feeling a sudden rush of pride and responsibility: I memorized their features, which baby was which, and I looked between all their tiny faces and thought, “I’ll be the best person I can for you. I’ll always be there.”

2. How frustrated I could get with a tiny human. Times three.

When I was in 8th grade, they sharpied all over my art final the weekend before it was due. Sometimes they fight over video games relentlessly. Sometimes they destroy their room instead of going to sleep. But then, despite any frustration, getting asked to “snuggle” until they fall asleep melts my heart all over again.

3. How many crazy things I'd do to make them happy.

I’ll drive 20 minutes across town to go to the park they want to go to, even though there’s one down the road. I’ll make weird faces, host “dance and popcorn” parties, bake cookies, sleep on their floor in a fort, watch the same Curious George 10 times, really anything. I’d do anything to make them happy.

4. Nothing's better than hearing them say my name.

When they first started talking, it was like hearing my name for the first time, only it was more like “Bay-wee” and a lot cuter than anyone else could ever say it. Hearing them call for me from waking up, or over the phone, or in all the old videos I have of them as toddlers, reiterates all over again how “Bay-wee” is the best name I’ll ever have.

5. Getting a text or FaceTime call makes everything 100 times better.

Since I’ve been at college for a year, FaceTime and texts are what I’ve had to rely on to hear about MineCraft, or airplanes, or their new teachers. Being at college and away from family can be hard, but when my phone starts ringing and I know they’re on the other end, it makes everything better.

6. Knowing that they’re always going to be there.

I get to come home and know they’ll be there waiting. (We get to live next door forever.) They’re the best thing in my hometown. I can’t wait to see them get braces, go to their first prom, graduate high school, become young men. I love that I get to be there.

7. How they’ve taught me to have fun and stop to pick the weeds.

As toddlers, they’d make mud pies out of dirt, and instead of playing soccer, (one) of them picked the yellow weeds. They’d get distracted by helicopters and airplanes and watch the sky until they were out of sight. Everything was funny, and anything could be turned into a knock knock joke. They ask me to build sandcastles and they make up worlds where they can do and be anything, and I want to tell them that they can. I’ve never believed in anyone so much.

8. How proud I can get over every goal made and every milestone reached.

Soccer goals, assignments returned home, reading after school for 20 minutes, every and any accomplishment makes me so proud. They're reading whole books, and I'm here remembering the pudgy babies sprawled over my lap as I read Thomas Train books. They’ve reached and surpassed so many milestones already.

9. Learning what loving someone unconditionally means.

It’s just knowing that no matter what, nothing can change it. It still surprises me sometimes, how looking at them is like looking at the whole world.

10. I’d give my life for theirs.

Since I knew of their existence, I promised to take care of them. But as it turned out, they’ve taken care of me. During any of my hardest times, they are my reasons to keep going.

Needless to say, I could keep going. I’ve had a special bond with all three of them since they were born and I recognize how lucky I am to have relationships with my cousins in that way. It’s like having three more siblings. Watching them grow up is the coolest thing and the greatest privilege of mine. I’m sure the learning will never end for me.